Every magazine I know has a section where they talk about relationships, tips on how to „keep the flame burning”, the secret to a perfect relationship… you get the point. When I was in my 20s, me and my girls were reading Cosmopolitan. I can’t stop smiling as I remember the tips they were giving us. We were young and foolish, but it was fun for sure to read them. They should come with a disclaimer: don’t believe everything you read. J
Long time has passed and with it came experience. The experience of a long time relationship, of course. I am married for 4 years and have been in a relationship with my husband for more than 7. We are more in love now than we’ve been when we met. We’ve grown together, our relationship evolved over the years, it has changed for the better. It’s not perfect, and it will never be, as I don’t believe in perfection, but it is exactly as it’s supposed to be for us to be happy. This is what all is about, isn’t it? What makes YOU happy is what counts.
The secret to evolving? Communicating & compromising. I wrote some time ago an article about compromising, and I truly believe what I said there. I asked my mother (she is married for 40 years) what’s their „secret” and she said exactly the same. If you have a secret, I can’t wait to hear yours and exchange views on the subject, so feel free to write your experiences in the comments section below.
It took me a while to understand exactly how to communicate with my husband so that he could understand me, but he made it really simple for me at one point and I quote: „Dear, if you want me to hear you, you need to speak to me in a simple & direct manner, and tell me exactly what you want. I cannot guess and I don’t want to do it; and if you write something to me, please make it short cause’ you lose me after the first paragraph!” Crystal clear! That’s why I use bullets now. 🙂
But what’s the secret in keeping the passion over the years? What’s the first thing that comes to your mind? 🙂 Yah, I know what you are thinking… Communicating? Compromising? Nooo, it’s the intimate relationship you have with your loved one. And what an intimate relationship would it be without some sexy stuff from time to time to spice up things? And when I say sexy, I don’t mean in the „Fifty shades of Grey” style, you naughty girls… You don’t have to go that far, unless you’re into it…
Let’s face it, the intimate part of the relationship is important, but what’s more important is the whole package. The small gestures, the big applause and recognition when it’s well deserved, the support given to each other, caring and respecting one another.
You can’t have one without the other if you want to call it a relationship… Don’t you agree?
I am so interested in finding out your own views about what keeps the passion, what makes a relationship work, based on your own experiences. There is no perfect recipe for a “perfect” relationship, but I’m sure there are some key ingredients that work on every single one…
So, Divas, what’s your secret?