N-am mai scris de ceva timp in seria Urban Mom – Untold story of motherhood, si azi m-am gandit ca nu ar fi rau sa o continui, mai ales ca de-a lungul timpului uiti tot felul de detalii si tare as vrea sa apuc sa le scriu inainte de a le uita.
Daca nu ati citit vreunul dintre articolele seriei, le gasiti aici, dar asa in 2 cuvinte, este povestea sarcinii mele destul de dificile si a vietii mele de mama, cu bune si cu rele, cu greutati dar si multe bucurii, cu provocari, asa cum este ea in realitate si nu cum ne-o imaginam noi.
Asa cum va povesteam si in articolul anterior, am rasuflat usurati dupa rezultatul amniocentezei si cum perioada cea mai grea parea sa fie deja istorie, priveam optimista spre viitor si speram ca restul lunilor pana la nasterea fetitei vor fi linistite si fara probleme. Doar ca n-a fost sa fie chiar asa…
Contractiile au inceput in perioada post – amniocenteza, doar ca initial nu imi dadeam seama ca asta sunt. Aveam dureri daca mergeam pe jos 200 de metri si apoi incepea ceva ce parea a fi contractii, dar pentru ca nu aveam nici 6 luni si eram la prima sarcina, nu eram sigura ca asta sunt.
[EN] It’s been a while since the previous article from the UrbanMom- Untold Story of Motherhood series, so today I thought it would not be bad to continue it, especially as over time I tend to forget some details and I want to start writing them before that happens.
If you haven’t read any of the articles from the Urban Mom series, they can be read here, but in two words, is the story of my difficult pregnancy and my life as a mother, with good and bad, with challenges and many joys, as it is in reality and not as we imagine it.
As I was telling you in the previous article, we were relieved when the results from the amniocentesis came and showed that our baby was fine, so I was optimistic about the months to come which we hope to be quiet and without any other problems. Only that it wasn’t quite what we hoped to be…
The contractions started during the post-amniocentesis period, but because it was my first pregnancy and I wasn’t even in the 6th month I wasn’t sure what they were. I couldn’t walk for more than 200 m because some severe back pains would start and after that something what seem like contractions would follow.
8 months pregnant (personal archive)
Durerile si contractiile mi-au limitat destul de mult libertatea de miscare, oboseam repede desi nu aveam o burta mare dar macar eram fericita ca nu imi mai era fizic atat de rau. Candva spre 7 luni, intr-o vineri seara in care culmea mai eram si singura acasa, cu sotul plecat in team-building, incep contractiile cu o frecventa destul de mare. Cam la 5 minute sa zic. Imi sun de urgenta doctora, imi spune ce sa iau si sa stau linistita. Daca ajung la interval de 3 minute sa plec de urgenta la spital. N-am ajuns, s-au mai linistit, dar cine n-a dormit toata noaptea si se ducea la control de urgenta sambata?! 🙂 Mi-au facut tot felul de teste, inclusiv una pentru membrane parca (daca mai imi aduc corect aminte), au vazut ca tine colul si m-am intors acasa. Prietena mea, care a mers cu mine, imi zice cand plecam: ”Mai lipsea sa ajungi si la serclaj. Cred ca Erica vrea sa se asigure ca nu mai faci unul dupa ea. :))”
Nu trecea zi fara contractii. Mai usoare, mai puternice, dar nu era zi fara macar un episod. Ma obisnuisem cu ele. In plus, Erica era un copil agitat inca din burtica. Se misca mai tot timpul, burta mea parea ca detine o dansatoare ce exersa non-stop. 🙂 Daca nu se misca cateva ore intram in panica si imi faceam tot felul de scenarii.
Mi-am petrecut restul sarcinii intre controale si analize, stand mai mult decat miscandu-ma si astept sa treaca perioada aceea. Nu o sa va ascund frustrarile si nici parerea de rau ca nu am putut sa ma bucur mai mult de sarcina mea. Mi s-a parut un drum lung si anevoios, epuizant fizic si psihic, presarat cu tot felul de probleme mai mari sau mai mici cat sa ma tina in priza si sa nu ma pot bucura de experienta aceea. Pe de alta parte, stiu ca se putea si mai rau, deci sunt fericita ca la finalul sarcinii am putut tine un copil sanatos in brate.
[EN] The pain and contractions limited the freedom of movement and I was quickly getting tired. One evening, when I was home alone and husband away on team-building, contractions started to intensify and they were about 5 minutes apart. I was about 7 months pregnant. I called my doctor and she told what meds to take and if the contractions would increase frequency to go to hospital. Lucky for me, the meds helped and contractions stopped at one point. The next day I went to the hospital to check what happened, and after a series of tests, the doctor sent me home, because it seemed like my cervix was holding and the uterine membranes were still intact.
When we were going home, my friend who came with me said joking: “Thank God you didn’t need a cervical cerclage. I think Erica wants to be sure that you’re not going to make another child after her, considering how much you went through. :)”
There was no day without contractions, lighter or more intense. I have gotten used to them. Additionally, Erica was moving constantly inside and felt like I was having a little dancer in my belly (she loves to dance now 🙂 . If she wasn’t moving for a few hours I used to panic and relax only when I felt her again.
I spent the rest of my pregnancy between tests, constantly being monitored, standing more than moving and waiting for time to pass. I won’t hide my frustrations and the sorrow I felt that I could not enjoy more the time left. It seemed to be a long and hard journey, physically and mentally exhausting, with all kinds of problems, large or small enough to stop me from enjoying the pregnancy. On the other hand, I know it could have been worse, so I’m happy that at the end of this journey I could hold a healthy baby in my arms.
I day before giving birth to Erica
Multi spun ca uiti durerile si iti aduci aminte doar partile bune. Gresit. Eu n-am uitat nimic, iar experienta sarcinii a avut prea putine parti bune ca sa am ce imi aminti. In schimb, singurul lucru extraordinar si pentru care a meritat totul este copilul meu, cel care mi-a dat putere. Chiar si in cele mai grele situatii prin care poti trece (si am cunoscut mame care au trecut prin situatii cu mult mai dificile) puterea ti-o transmite chiar copilul, printr-o conexiune ciudata si inexplicabila, ce te face sa lupti mai departe si sa treci peste tot.
Fie ca voi sa va bucurati doar de sarcini usoare, dar totusi sa stiti ca orice s-ar intampla, veti gasi intotdeauna putere sa treceti peste toate. Pentru ca mamele sunt super fiinte… 🙂
[EN] Many say you forget the pain and remember only the good parts. Wrong. I haven’t forgotten anything, and the pregnancy experience had less good parts to remember. Instead, the only thing that was great and deserved everything is my child, who has given me strength. Even in the toughest situations that you can be (and I met mothers who have been through situations much more difficult) the baby gives you the power through a strange and unexplained connection, that makes you fight and get over everything.
May you experience only the beautiful parts of pregnancy and know that no matter what, somehow, you will find strength to overcome whatever comes in your way.
Photos: dear Sebi
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